lafix:

squibble:

I want to remake Titanic, but with a major script change.

In every scene where Rose asks a question, the answer is said with a sarcastic tone and always followed up with “YOU’RE SO STUPID, ROSE”.

Jack: I’m more concerned about the water being so cold.
Rose: How cold?
Jack: FREEZING COLD, DUH. YOU’RE SO STUPID, ROSE.

Rose: I want you to draw me like one of your French girls.
Jack: THEY WERE WHORES. ARE YOU A WHORE TOO? YOU’RE SO STUPID, ROSE.

Jack: Shhh. Gimme your hand. Now close your eyes, go on. Now step up. Now hold on to the railing. Keep your eyes closed, don’t peek.
Rose: I’m not.
Jack: Step up on the railing. Hold on, hold on. Keep your eyes closed. Do you trust me?
Rose: I trust you.
Jack: All right. Open your eyes.
Rose: I’m flying, Jack!
Jack: NO YOU’RE STILL ON A GODDAMN BOAT! WTF! YOU’RE SO STUPID, ROSE.

Rose: Mr. Andrews, I saw the iceberg and I see it in your eyes, please tell me the truth.
Mr. Andrews: The ship will sink.
Rose: Are you certain?
Mr. Andrews: IT’S NOT LIKE I KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE SHIP. I JUST BUILT THE FUCKING THING. UGH. YOU’RE SO STUPID, ROSE.

This is the best thing ever.